"American Tourists in Europe," "Stop Screaming," and "Do You Think (This Poem Is Too Long)?"
American Tourists in Europe
In Paris
You can forget about
Those gothic cathedrals!
In Venice
We bought color slides
Of the Holy Spirit.
In Germany
We pretended
(Even the girls and women)
That we were the sons of Hitler.
Some of us role-played on our tour bus.
It was fun. It was very fun!
We didn’t like Paris.
We didn’t like Amsterdam.
We didn’t like Rome.
We didn’t like London.
We didn’t like Madrid.
Too big, too dirty, too expensive,
Too many prostitutes.
Europe is, as far as we can tell,
A very dirty place, you know.
You know what I mean?
Stop Screaming
“Stop screaming!” he screamed.
She had lost all her hair
to chemotherapy. And he was
the kind of man
whose sons would all
eventually commit suicide.
Fortunately, they had no children.
I’m just kidding!
This is a poem!
Do you expect
More useful facts
In a poem for God’s sake?
I am lying, of course.
This is not a poem.
That bad man never had three sons.
I’m just kidding!
Do You Think (This Poem Is Too Long)?
Do you think it is fun being human?
Do you think it is distracting being human?
Do you think it is bourgeois being human?
Do you think it is nasty being human?
Do you think it is coincidental being human?
Do you think it is marginal being human?
Do you think it is parsimonious being human?
Do you think it is credible being human?
Do you think it is “a stretch” being human?
Do you think it is pathetic being human?
Do you think it is remarkable being human?
Do you think it is something being human?
Do you think it is anything being human?
Do you think it is nothing being human?
Do you think it is worthwhile being human?
Do you think it is exciting being human?
Do you think it is “goodbye, farewell, adieu” being human?
Do you think this poem is too long? Too short? Just right?
Do you think this is really a poem? The Socratic method
Out-of-control? A childish interrogation meant to demean
The human spirit? An homage to Donald Barthelme?
A historic first attempt to allow the reader to complete a
Poetic work of art? What? You tell us. (Fill in the blank . . .
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![Raymond Keen Raymond Keen](https://www.unlikelystories.org/sites/default/files/Raymond%20Keen%20photo%20for%20Unlikely%20Stories%20Mark%20V%20-%208-25-2019.jpg)
Raymond Keen was educated at Case Western Reserve University and the University of Oklahoma. He spent three years as a Navy clinical psychologist with a year in Vietnam (July 1967 – July 1968). Since that time he has worked as a school psychologist and licensed mental health counselor in the USA and overseas, until his retirement in 2006. He is a credentialed school psychologist in the states of California and Washington, and a licensed mental health counselor in the state of Washington.
Raymond is the author of Love Poems for Cannibals. He is also the author of a drama, The Private and Public Life of King Able. Raymond’s poetry has been published in 41 literary journals.