It's feckin' cold in Ireland, Jesus,
the dogs have nowhere to hump
and all the rain puddles have mud;
where's a dog got to go
to get a clean drink these days,
with no owners to leave
out bowls of kindness or charity?
All the dogs do now is lick their balls
and wait; at least the free ones are left
alone to do so; Ganymedes, Cai Lun,
Origen and Boston Corbett moan
their loss, despite degrees of self-
infliction, lost in the kennels of
Skopsty, Heaven's Gate and Cybele.
The bitches turn their heads away,
snarling, barking, slobbering
waves of hatred flow freshly
from the River Styx: let them
keep in the dead, if only to
remind the living what lies in wait.
It's feckin, cold in Ireland, Jesus,
what with all these lifeless mutts
fouling their tongues onto the pavements,
cuckolded by their own spirits;
Leopold roams, unfulfilled
by a faithful wife, he masochistic,
she, no sadist to the end.
Record every moment,
describe every thought. It gets weary,
like listening to a songbird
through a megaphone:
you appreciate the melody
although you don't need to hear
every note, a bomb blast
pushed out from the throat.
You stab your own neck with a pen,
a tracheotomy of speech
for others to choke on,
so eventually who can tell
what is blood and what is ink.
Did no one ever whisper to you
that man can't live on words alone,
no matter how much you shout them?
The presence of a well
at the garden's bottom
was enough to discourage
the cheekiest of birds,
their venture sports
confined to motorways
A dog once drowned
down there, before you moved in
you know, I remember the year.
After summer, and the thirst of canines
was enough to encourage
a sad exploration.
If this tragic canine
was told in advance of his death,
he might have waited
until he knew what true thirst was.
Born at the tail end of the seventies in Northern Ireland, Colin Dardis is a poet, artist, and sometimes musician. He edits Speech Therapy, an online zine focusing on poetry from Ireland and beyond. He is also the co-ordinator of Make Yourself Heard, an open mike poetry night. His first collection, left of soul, is available via lulu.com.
right on. that is what i am talking about.