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Our Pricing Plans

We also have 3-way calling. This service is great
for if you have a long-distance call, perhaps, and
you need to find out something from someone
else. Rather than have to call this person back, you
can put your caller on hold while you dial another
number. Get the information. It's a very convenient

    How often is that going to happen?

I don't know.

No thanks. 

Now         how many listings did you want in the 
phone book? You can have up to three listings.
Three different names.

    Is there a charge for having more than one listing?

No, sir, there is no charge.

Okay.     You can put in two listings.   One under
that name.    And one under A.      Hitler.

     Excuse me?

A, as in Albert.    Last name     Hitler.

          Are you serious?

                  Then Ohmart. o h m a r t   b.    b as in bzzzzz.

                                 Okay.  Would you be interested
in any of our repair and maintenance plans?


It's two dollars a month. 

          You have a really nice voice.

It's still two dollars a month.

No, I'm serious.       What do you look like? You want
to go out sometime?

           You're asking me out, you don't know what I 
look like.   You must be fat, at the computer all day, or
else you're always looking at your shoes. Tell me which
it is.

                                                               Let me speak to your superior.

If you mean my boss

Let me speak t

Hold on. 

Can I help you?"

    I was calling for prices. I run a business from home. I was
trying to be nice, be friendly. Your girl insulted me. Called me
fat and tried my patience. I have a sense of humor, but I don't
expect personal attacks ordering something. You want my
business? Respect. Ask that black singer how to spell it.

"Sir. We apologize. If you were insulted or demeaned in any
way, we are very

Hey, I won't say I was deMeaned. DeMeaned.   You aren't
Big enough to do that.    I always feel at my best when I am
alone, and am I given to understand that no one is important
enough to demean me.   I'm not a plea for help.

"Of course not."

My stomach isn't protruding, no matter what your girl says.
And I'm not looking for meals with sad eyes on television. 
   You can't Break me.      You don't have the stuff.     You
have a cute voice.
           "Sir.      Your first month free if you hang up now."

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