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puttouseTo Matthew Shugart's previous piece     thoughts from the roof of an eight floor parking garageTo Matthew Shugart's next piece

this is as close to the end

as wheelchairs are pushed down access ramps
as cold cities begin to heat up again
as the spring of 2001 sweeps across america

and the bed I'm in
is dark from evening
it is as beautiful a moment as there ever was

more full of horror than anything
        dim light
        green grass
        fields of green grass
        never touched by mowing machines
virgin...unlike all of us

this is the beautiful moment to hold on to
it is the horrible tragedy
we are all waiting to face

our breath stinks of it
our fingernails dirty
bodies unkempt
we dream of this moment as children
        seeing ourselves run through rows of corn stalks
        with our arms stretched straight out
        as children
        sneaking into alleyways
                smoking cigarettes and cheap pot
our breath stinks of it
we are bloated and dying
this is the most beautiful moment ever
you can see clearly
as our fists clench tightly around it

refusing to let go

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