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Things to Tell My Therapist in Session Today: I guess it's been a good week; work's been slowing down a bit; I still have eight cigarettes left; but I do have writer's block: I'm in the middles of poems about my parents not knowing me at all, and Mos Def and how I have no sense of self; I can't remember--did we fight today?-- seems like we did, I'm pretty tense; my memory is shit these days, and Thursday always feels like Tuesday; (twenty minutes left.) What else? What else? Oh, yes…I think I am wasting my money by coming to see you; I don't think it's helping me much; I wonder what you're thinking, while you sit and judge me, tall and thin in your Prada shoes; I try hard not to bore you, sorry my life has been in a rut. (I do need to get a haircut, but I want you to like it when it's done); how will I get better if I can't or won't tell you how I really feel because I am too busy trying to impress you? Once some time ago when you were yawning while I talked, I considered saying "I don't think I should come back." (How can I expect someone else to save me when I don't even help or like myself?) I haven't cried once today; I take that as a really good sign (in spite of awful cramps!); I guess what I'm saying is I really think I can do it alone from here, but…do you suppose it's possible that I could still get the discounted meds?
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