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How I Came to America Screaming, having left it all, all this earth, before, and on my own terms, too: having set out this place and determined against it: everyone should determine against being born if they don't like it. But doing so discourages one. One finds oneself in a city, San Francisco, say, and the streams of people one doesn't know and the man behind the counter won't even talk to you about your breakfast he made for you, your condition, your... In the Qur'an, when the men suddenly disappeared, Solomon-was it Solomon?-realized they were spirits, not men, their question a test, not a true quandry he was to determine the rightness, the wrong of. Like if suicide is so wrong, why have I done it so often?