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Dr Katz Psychiatrist
Part 1: True Dreams
 
Dear doctor
 
I really enjoy your show
your representations of human 
nature are so accurate,
can you please briefly
comment on  or interpret
the following recent 
dreams & what they 
may reveal about me 
& my relationship
with my girlfriend? 
 
1
Iím in a bookshop flipping
through an 1834 illustrated
book of the moon (no shit)    
tinged brown fantastical images 
turning page after page  
the train arriving-
 
2
Iím slowly dancing
holding my wifeís head
to a Barry Manilow 
song ĎWhat the World
Needs Now is Love Sweet
Loveí but itís not actually
her head Iím holding
she is seating  nearby
watching us
 
3
playing cricket my partner
bowls me a wicked bouncer
& I hit it hard baseball style
in the middle of the bat    I watch
the white ball soar-  growing smaller
dissolving into the blue & then 
re-emerging falling 
highlighted against
a steep rocky outcrop 
flecked with
orange ochre
 
4
I accidentally stumble upon
a group practicing yoga sex
legs twisting incongruently into the air
a panting synchronised orgy 
a muscly female suggests that if I tongue her
sheíll return the favour
I get down & lick & bob & suck
her sweet virginal hole
eventually dry humping her without success-
 
she gets up & she is actually a he
he says that he has already blown off nine guys that day
& refuses to suck me off
he recommends a cream to rub on my dick
to prevent infection
 
I walk to the Chemist
& apply a liberal amount of the substance on my prick
I read the label
& realise the cream is a kind of super glue
which would leave me with a permanent but unfeeling erection-
I find a public toilet
& desperately begin scrapping off the glue in a basin
with the side of a pair of scissors
 
an old man comes in & starts laughing
 
5
we have a wild party afterwards-
she is vacuuming the aboveground pool
with an ordinary household vacuum
carrying it above her head 
like a World War 2 Marine
a sausage dog is frantically swimming behind her
attached to a chain-
it starts yelping
& then its head gradually submerges
she yells to us to jump in to save it
fully clothed I dive in
my glasses hit the water
all becomes murky
 
your early considered response
would be greatly appreciated 
 
yours sincerely
 
Mark List

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