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thoughts from the roof of an eight floor parking garage

when I turned 13 my parents began trusting me
to be alone in the house for a few hours while they
spent time with friends
        I was both assured and terrified
        that they would die in a car wreck
        while away

I would cry and cry
until they returned
and found me holding my dog
       convinced that it would be just us from there on out

to assure my sanity
a doctor put me on prozac
and talked to me once a week

mom and dad continued to go out and eventually I got over it
      no more telling them to be careful five times before they left
      no more praying to God... don't take them
      no more watching headlights drive by
                   hoping it was them
      no more sweet relief when the watched pot finally boiled over
somehow I just got over it
&
moved onto more serious forms of mental illness
missing those nights holding the dog
thinking it would just
be us

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