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I've lost something

this is my brute concerto
I’m delirious 
I’m the perfect choice
so read me
editor 
or fuck off
it doesn’t matter
I suppose

the sun will still rise
and fame doesn’t help
nor money 
the ocean still floats
and pain still lives
breathes
and fucks the essence out of me

I wake up.  the alarm clock alarms me.  I might die today or get promoted.  despots sleep
easier.  I shower.  my small cock is afraid.  he knows he may never get laid.  he is
disconcerted like I.  I draw funny cartoons on the bathroom mirror.  I go back to bed.

what is this poem?
this death?
this living flesh? 

I sit among artificial ego
drinking a coca cola 
eating a ritz cracker 

my cave, my room 
where nobody knows the pain 
like I do 
I choke away small victories 
smoke light cigarettes
and dread age 
renew faith in misery

I go to work.  my world is becoming complex.  I see the world through a nicotine
windshield.  I think of poems. of death.  I need to find a woman to save me from all this.
my cock is shivering with fright.

this world never ends 
I’ve lost something 
I smoke too much
drinking is my hobby
a bird flutters by my window
like bacon in a frying pan 
I’ve lost something.

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