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Chelsea

My cat weighs some 25 pounds.
A tiny, bewitching face and dainty paws
Drifting on a vast ocean of rolling flesh.

When I see her every day, she looks fine to me,
But when I get home from the airport,
She’s a grotesque! A freak!

I give her low-fat Cool Whip,
And extra-lean cold cuts,
But nothing helps.

I’m nice to my cat,
I treat her right,
But mostly, she ignores me.

Chelsea looks sweet,
Like a big, soft teddy bear,
But it turns out she’s a real bitch.